Im happy but there is a heavy feeling of sadness in my heart that I just can't remove. Why am I like this?

You are like me, then.

What I am trying to say is that when you stop trying to change yourself into something you are not, you give yourself the gift of discovering yourself as you already are.

So if you are sad - like me - then be sad.

NASA withdraws support for conferences - SpaceNews

The sadness was still there.

I had run out of hope.

Needless to say, my failed attempts to fix my sadness simply brought me more pain and suffering.

What types of cushioning does Nike use in their running shoes?

And the sadness?

But unlike before, there is no more resistance to the sadness.

What most people don’t know unless they’ve looked more closely is that there is also an element of deep, profound sadness that has always been with me since as long as I can remember.

NASA Discovers That Venus’ Surface Is Still Alive: New Evidence of Active Geology - The Daily Galaxy

So I finally threw my hands up and said something to the tune of “fuck it, since I can't seem to change, I’ll just be whatever I am then.”

Be who you already are.

I was tired of fighting.

NASA’s Chandra Sees Surprisingly Strong Black Hole Jet at Cosmic “Noon” - NASA (.gov)

I was tired of trying and failing.

In the absence of a should, I was free to be as I am.

Now, this may sound like a story of failure and giving up, but it’s actually a story of liberation.

Verizon announces wild new offer to win back angry customers - TheStreet

Without resistance, sadness has a sense of beauty and depth I cannot find otherwise in life.

It’s still here.

Your job is not to be the manager of your life, but the one who discovers yourself fully.

Reality TV star’s son dead at 16: ‘Life is so cruel and unfair’ - AL.com

It’s difficult to put into words exactly what caused what, but to the best of my ability to describe it, I felt as if my will to keep fighting was beaten right out of me.

When I stopped trying to force myself to be something I am not, I gave myself the freedom of being who I am.

Most people that know me would probably describe me as a social, happy, and somewhat quirky person with a twisted sense of humor.

Do you want to have an XXX chat?

This interpretation lead me on a path of self improvement, to fix what I considered to be “wrong” with myself.

It’s impossible to overstate the freedom and peace I discovered, and I realized the only one who had been keeping those from me was… me and my imagined standards and expectations for how I had imagined I should be.

It’s the most beautiful and liberating thing in the world.

Corey Conners withdraws from U.S. Open after injury striking camera cable - Awful Announcing

For much of my adult life, I interpreted this sadness as something being wrong - with either myself or my life in general.

But no matter what I read or practiced, I could never make the sadness budge for longer than a few fleeting moments - and even then, it was likely due to me being distracted from the sensation of sadness rather than anything actually shifting.

You are the masterpiece you came here to discover.

What are some reasons why some people may be against stay-at-home dads or working moms?

It’s here now, writing to you.

It wasn’t until about 10 years ago that I finally fell out of that ferris wheel of trying and failing to fix myself.